Scenario 1: Suspicious Minds.
      ”Base, this is Car Three-Niner, requesting backup to Van Cortland Park. I have three males under observation. Two appear to be American, one uncertain ethnicity but may be European…They are all wearing woollen hats and military-grade weather gear…They are currently occupying a stationary Black Buick and appear to be looking at a map of New York…No weapons are visible, repeat no weapons are visible, but they are in possession of large bags or rucksacks, and they appear to be carrying optical equipment…Base, the vehicle doors are opening and the three men are exiting…Base, all three men are exiting the vehicle and they are definitely carrying something under their coats…I can see the bulges, Base…permission to ready our weapons…Base, do we have permission to ready our weapons?…They are reaching into their coats and pulling something out, I repeat, they are reaching into their coats…Where’s that back-up Base?…Wait, what the hell are those - Base, stand down, I repeat stand down, you won’t believe it but they’re carrying binoculars - they’re goddam birdwatchers…Yes, it is still snowing heavily and ten below, but they’re definitely birdwatchers…What’s that Base? Could we have them sectioned…? I’d have thought so, Base, I’d have thought so…”

Scenario 2: Comic Capers.
      ”Holy hotspots, Batman, have you seen this report? A trio of hardcore birders from the NBN are arriving in Gotham to do a “Big Morning”. Should we intercept them before they can get their nefarious plans underway?”
“Robin, my curiously over-excited young chum, I wonder…”
“Wonder what Batman?”
“…whether we should…Hmm, according to the bat-computer we’re looking at three of the most notorious bird-bloggers on the internet: “Mad Mike” Bergin (evil genius), “Cuthroat Corey” Finger (his apparently amiable partner in crime, but whose dedicated twitching has been known to leave his girlfriend alone for hours), and Charlie “The English Gentleman” Moores (a deceptively active twitcher whose cover is to fly around the world while working for an airline). Hmm…these are indeed…three of the baddest birders to come to the tri-State in a long time …”
“We need to act now Batman, who knows how many of the city’s birds are going to be disturbed when these three go on the rampage!”
“…our feathered friends appear to need us Robin, a cause very close to your heart I know…”
“Batman, let’s not waste a second.”
“Draw breath, my hyperventilating sidekick, draw breath…have you - by chance - looked outside?”
“Outside Batman?”
“Outside Robin, where the snow has been falling for about ten hours and the temperature is now so low that I don’t believe even this telescope-toting trio of terrible twitchers would dare to leave their car.”
“You mean…”
“I mean Robin that the glass in their binoculars would crack in the extreme cold, their limbs would seize solid, and their boots freeze to the ground. I believe we’re safe…”
“Shivering snowdrifts, Batman, that’s a relief.”
“…Let’s just be grateful, my red-vested young friend, that the one man who could have taken such weather in his slithery stride is not joing them…”
“You mean…that flippered freak, that twisted terror…”
“Indeed so, my alliterating ally…the Penguin…” [cue loud music and much laughter from our two heroes etc etc]

Scenario 3: Irvine Welsh’s blog.
       “***# you if you think for one **$^##”** minute I’m going out there to look for a *##”"* bird in this %%##### weather you’ve got to be ***@@## mental you @####** ### ah’m no freezing my nads off for a ####!! Rusty ****!!! Blackbird for all the smack in Glasgow and ye can tae a kek where it makes your ***!!!## eyes water you mad &”"@@@!!! if you so much as make a @@@!!### move to try tae get me oot a’ this car…you ### @@”"****!!!!…”

Scenario 4: Over the Top.
      ”Chaps, I know what you’re thinking - it’s suicide to leave the car. Out there it’s cold, it’s snowing, there’s ice…in here it’s warm and we’re safe…but we didn’t come all this way to back out now…we didn’t fight our way across the city to give in when we’re so close…We need these birds, our lists need these birds, our passion IS these birds…these Rusty Blackbirds, these American Tree and White-throated Sparrows, these Blue Jays…yes, we may see them somewhere else this year, yes, we may find them again when the sun is shining and the horror of this cold, cold day has long receded…but we’re here NOW, we’re here TODAY, we’re equipped and we’re ready…this is what we’ve planned for, this is what we’ve sacrificed our beds for, for this moment, for these memories, for these ticks on our year-list…yes, we may all be here again one day, but who knows what will happen in the future, who knows where our paths will take us, which of us can say with any certainty that we WILL all meet again some sunny day…NOW is the time, NOW is the moment, NOW my friends, NOW…give notice to the blogosphere that we won’t let ice and snow defeat us, that we are the stuff of birding legend, that we WILL NOT GIVE UP…this is the hour, my friends, let’s seize it and make IT OURS….”

Scenario 5:[That's enough scenarios ~ Eds]

For posts that actually talk about the birds and about what was actually a fantastic morning’s birding, have a look at -

• Corey’s Dipping on Owls at Pelham Bay Park
• Mike’s Put on a Happy Face

Day List Highlights (new birds for the Year underlined):
Brent Goose Branta bernicla 50+; Wood Duck Aix sponsa 2; American Wigeon Anas americana 10+; American Black Duck Anas rubripes 30-40; Canvasback Aythya valisineria c)20; Redhead Aythya americana 2; Ring-necked Duck Aythya collaris c)10; Long-tailed Duck Clangula hyemalis 3; Black Scoter Melanitta nigra 100+; Hooded Merganser Lophodytes cucullatus 30+; Sharp-shinned Hawk Accipiter striatus 1; Grey Plover Pluvialis squatarola 4-5; Red-bellied Woodpecker Melanerpes carolinus 5-6; Downy Woodpecker Picoides pubescens 2; Horned Lark Eremophila alpestris 2; Ruby-crowned Kinglet Regulus calendula 1; Carolina Wren Thryothorus ludovicianus 2+; Winter Wren Troglodytes troglodytes 1; American Robin Turdus migratorius 1; Black-capped Chickadee Poecile atricapilla c)10; Tufted Titmouse Baeolophus bicolor 6-8; Brown Creeper Certhia americana 1; Blue Jay Cyanocitta cristata c)10; American Tree Sparrow Spizella arborea 10+; “Ipswich” Savannah Sparrow Passerculus sandwichensis 4-5; Fox Sparrow Passerella iliaca 1; White-throated Sparrow Zonotrichia albicollis 5+; Dark-eyed Junco Junco hyemalis 5+; Snow Bunting Plectrophenax nivalis c)10; Red-winged Blackbird Agelaius phoeniceus 50+; Rusty Blackbird Euphagus carolinus c)20